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Surrendering can be so scary!

Updated: Feb 18, 2019

I’m a person that is very goal oriented and I can appreciate a certain level of predictability aka control. So the idea of completely letting go and letting God takeover in theory is amazing but my human tendencies are causing me to feel uneasy.

How did I get here anyway? I’ve always known for the most part that I’m not a hustler and being in flow works best for me. So how or when does the hustling actually takeover? I call them triggers.

Triggers are the things that knock me right out of flow. Things that make me feel like what I’m doing is not enough or my way is taking to long. It could be a social media post, podcast, book, conversation, book... you name it! I’ve found triggers in all of them.

Lack of trust. I’ve been losing faith. One of my biggest fears is wasting time or running out of time. Going with the flow is great but how long is that going to take? Time should never be a factor when following God’s plan. I am the one getting in my own way. The longer I take to surrender, the longer it will take to get to my desired outcome.

It‘s scary but I’m going to recommit myself. God knows best! Who am I fooling to think that my way wasn’t the actual time waster. I surrender to God’s will and purpose for my life.

What does surrender look like? Surrender looks like knowing that God knows every want and desire in my heart. Even the ones that I don’t even know that I need. Trusting that he will order my steps One foot at a time. Asking everyday in prayer, how can I be used for the highest and greatest good? Where would you have me to go? What would you have me to say? Who would you have me say it to? Listening and being obedient to the call even if it doesn’t make sense.

To get what you’ve never had you have to do things you’ve never done. What God has called me to do is unprecedented. I will have to trust because their is no manual or model to follow.

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